Hiraeth
by You Are So Wonk
Summary: In which there are two witches born to the Evans family, but everything's still about Lily. Tansy didn't know why she expected any different. Reincarnated-OC-insert.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter.

* * *

Summary: In which there are two witches born to the Evans family, but everything's still about Lily. Tansy didn't know why she expected any different. OC-insert.

* * *

She knew she shouldn't have come.

The scent of fire whiskey covered the room, as music blared. People danced joyously, bodies connecting, as she sat off in the corner.

Tansy had always hated parties.

It was something her mother would always joke about. How she had come into the world completely silent, without a spark of hysteria. No excitement.

She had always known what to expect. Had always known what to do without any prompting from anyone.

In a sense, the party was for her. It was meant to celebrate Hufflepuff winning the first Quidditch game of the year, something the House didn't do often. It was meant to be a joyous occasion.

Her brow twitched, as Bertha Jorkins-_the cow_\- proceeded to shove her tongue down an unsuspecting fifth year's throat.

_(She could just sneak out-)_

"Do you insist to spend the night brooding?" Her lips curled upwards at the familiar voice. Caradoc Dearborn stood on her right side, passing her a bottle of fire whiskey. Tansy looked at him gratefully.

"I'm not brooding, Doc," She replied, shoving the taller boy's shoulder. "I'm… reminiscing. It's not exactly like I have a lot of time left here," The boy hummed at that.

"Don't remind me," The teen replied, wrapping an arm around the girl's shoulder. The smile he sent her was warm, inviting. "We're already in sixth year," He winked at a Seventh year, before nudging Tansy in the side. "How does it feel to win the first game of the year, Captain?"

"It_ does_ feel pretty amazing," She admitted, taking a swig of fire whiskey. "Lord knows Hufflepuff needs a win," Blue eyes crinkled at that, as Caradoc sent her a look from the corner of his eye. He leaned in conspiratorially.

"Wanna dance?" Tansy downed her drink at that, and grabbed onto the boy's hand. Her eyes brightened.

_(if it's with him… I don't mind it so much-)_

"I thought you'd never ask,"

* * *

She had met Caradoc Dearborn at the ripe age of eleven.

_"You do realize your knickers are showing, right?"_

Those had been the first words he had said to her.

She remembered wearing a plaid skirt, and standing on a stool to get a look at the top shelf in Flourish and Blotts. A boyish snicker broke her out of her musings.

_"Are you an idiot?"_ He questioned, hands in his pocket. Hair buzzed short. She remembered thinking he looked like a girl, despite it all. _"Polka dots, really?"_

Tansy had just blinked at that, before shrugging her shoulders. Blonde hair flowing over her shoulders.

_"Why are you so interested in my knickers?"_ She retorted, climbing down from the stool. _"No offense, but you're a bit too young for me,"_ His eyes had widened at that, before he grinned impishly.

_"As if I'd go for **you,**"_

It had been the start of a beautiful friendship.

She had worn her blonde hair in pigtails, had knobby knees, and would always resort to ducking her head when presented with new people.

To hide the atypical nature of her eyes.

They were a gift, her mother had said, a rare treat that had been passed down from her Great- Grandmother. One blue and one green

Tansy had hated them.

They had been jarring on her eleven year old face. Too large and protruding to truly be considered pretty.

'Toad Eyes' had been her nickname for her formative years. That and 'Freaky Eyes'.

The thought of it made her break down in laughter now.

Caradoc scowled at her, as he twirled her around.

"My goodness Evans, am I _that_ bad?"

"You've stepped on my feet at_ least_ three times, Dearborn," Tansy replied, swaying to the music.

"Not my fault your feet are abnormally large,"

Tansy hummed at that, before kicking the boy in the shins. He winced slightly, before looking off to the side.

"Alright, I guess I deserved that," he stated, staring off into the corner of the room. Tansy followed his line of vision.

Josie Alcott stood in the corner, brown eyes wide with mirth as Marlene Mckinnon proceeded to dance on the table. Chugging a mixture of different alcohols.

"Y'know," Tansy started off slowly, a smile tugging at her lips. "If you're that interested in Alcott, you might wanna try actually talking to her," Caradoc scoffed at that, as he tugged Tansy in a bit closer.

"Alcott? You know you're the only one for me," He joked, as the music got a little slower. Caradoc turned slightly solemn. "You know me Evans. Relationships are an inconvenience. A quick shag is always the way to go if you want to get someone off your mind,"

Tansy hummed at that, as the music stopped. She tilted her head upwards, and pressed a kiss to the boy's cheek.

"I love you Doc," She started off, as the music began once more. "But you're a complete idiot,"

The boy didn't argue, and just shrugged as he went to flirt with a rather curvaceous Ravenclaw.

* * *

"You're out past curfew," Tansy rolled her eyes at the address.

"Hullo to you too, Lil sis," She replied, words slightly slurred. "How does it feel to be prefect? You gonna take points off?" Lily looked affronted at that.

"Tansy," The redhead started off, as she moved closer to the shorter witch. Her green eyes were slightly narrowed. "Are you alright? How much have you had to drink?"

"Not enough," Tansy replied, forlornly as she squeezed the redhead in a hug. "There was a party, y'know? You should've been there. I hated it at first, but the booze was good-"

"Twenty points from Hufflepuff," Tansy blinked at that.

Lily looked stone faced, as she gently pushed Tansy off of her. She pursed her lips, as she walked past her. Tansy felt her heart twinge slightly at that.

Lily stopped for a moment, before continuing forward.

"Go to bed, Tansy," The redhead replied, as she turned the corner.

* * *

_"Petunia, Tansy, this is Lily,"_ Mismatched eyes had stared down at the bundle that laid so comfortably in her mother's arms. Zinnia Evans smiled softly at the two of them, as she rocked Lily back and forth.

_"You'll look after her for me won't you? It's your job as her big sisters,"_

Petunia had nodded her head enthusiastically at that. Tansy, however, was a bit more hesitant.

She toddled over to where Lily was, her one year old body barely being able to walk. She reached a pudgy finger towards Lily's face.

The baby grabbed on.

Something warm had settled in Tansy's stomach at that, as she nodded her head slowly.

….

_(Lily Potter had been a talented witch. It's horrible she had to die so soon)_

….

**That was when the nightmares had begun.**

_(she remembered)_

* * *

_"They're only dreams,"_ Her mother would soothe, stroking Tansy's hair. _"You have nothing to worry about my love,"_

Tansy wished she could've believed her.

Images of people she hadn't yet met would plague her. Of them dying, _suffering._

_(Of her sister being struck down by a green light)_

Her eleventh birthday hadn't been a day she had dreamed of. She wasn't in love with the idea of magic like Lily had been, or disgusted like Petunia.

Tansy had been wary of it.

The moment her Hogwarts letter had made her way into her hands, Tansy felt something swell up in her stomach.

_(Disgust, anger, FEAR)_

She was a coward.

_(A coward that didn't want her baby sister to die so soon)_

Lily-_Perfect Lily that tried so hard. Worked so hard to prove she belonged in a world that didn't want her_\- deserved so much more than what was destined for her.

Tansy watched the redhead walk away, before sighing and straightening up. She walked forward a few more steps, before coming across a large door.

A smile overtook the blonde's face, as she walked into the Room of Requirement.

* * *

_Dear Tansy,_

_How has the school year been treating you?_

_Auror training is actual Hell in a hand basket. My bruises have bruises, and the people here are assholes._

_The head trainer, Moody, can kiss my arse. He singles me out, I swear._

_Caradoc told me that Hufflepuff won the first game of the year. I guess I was right to make you captain. All that's left is for you to win the Quidditch cup._

_Enough with the pleasantries. To answer your question, no, I have no information when it comes to horcruxes. And you will tell me how you know about those things when we next meet._

_I will say this, however. When it comes to creating a Horcrux, the process is horrific. Something that can't be spoken about openly, or even written on paper._

_Whatever your planning to do Tansy, don't. You're too damn reckless for your own good._

_Nothing but love,_

_Alice Greengrass_

_P.S. You're giving me grey hairs, Evans._

_P.P.S. I saw Fabian Prewitt the other day. He is FIT. Why'd you end things with him again?_

* * *

Alice had… discovered her in a sense.

She had been in her first year, nose buried in a book, when the upperclassmen had singled her out.

She had been fresh off the Quidditch pitch, sweat on her brow, dirt between her teeth when she locked eyes with Tansy.

"_Your eyes are amazing,"_ The blonde had prattled, watery blue eyes examining her. _"I've never seen such a thing,"_

She hadn't known how to react to that. The wind blew in her hair, as she nodded her head blankly.

_"Have you ever played Quidditch?"_ Alice had questioned, walking away from her friends. She plopped down next to Tansy. "_You got a good build. Hufflepuff's gonna need a new keeper next year,"_

_"I...I-"_

_"You should definitely try out,"_ The blonde replied, stretching out her arms. _"I gotta go hop in the shower, but I hope to run into you again?"_

_"Well-"_

_"Nice talking to you!"_ She had called out, before running to join her team. Tansy's jaw dropped, as she went over the previous encounter.

_(Are all the people here this weird?)_

* * *

_(She had tried out for the keeper position her second year, and thanks to the training of Alice had secured a spot on the team-)_

* * *

The Marauders had struck again.

Tansy looked down at her uniform, and snorted. Her black and yellow tie, was now a bright red and gold. Her hair being transformed into a bright orange. The entire of Hufflepuff suffering the same fate. Black and Potter high fived. Pettigrew laughed into his hand, and Lupin-ever the 'innocent' one- just looked amused.

Payback for winning the Quidditch game.

The snap of a camera made her turn her head.

Caradoc smiled down at her, in the same predicament she was in. Her picture came out immediately.

Her eyes were wide in the Polaroid, as she turned her head to the side hurriedly. The image repeating again and again.

She turned her head to the Gryffindor table, and felt her stomach clench slightly. Hazel eyes stared back at her unflinchingly.

_(her lips were pressed against his)_

She swept a strand of orange hair behind her ear, as she forced out a laugh. Marlene despaired at the state of her clothes, as Josie placed a comforting hand on her shoulder.

_(His hands roamed across her body-)_

She could still feel his eyes on her, as she downed a cup of pumpkin juice.

* * *

Author's Note: Here's the rewrite of Hiraeth! This has been a long time coming, and if you're an old reader you can probably tell that this story is a lot different than the original. For starters, Petunia isn't a witch in this one. This story follows Tansy Evans, the middle child of the Evans family. Tansy is one year older than Lily, and two years younger than Petunia. I've also decided to start the story off at a different place. Tansy is in her sixth year, while Lily and the Marauders are in their fifth. I hope you guys enjoy this rewrite!

Any questions you have for me?

_P.S. I love you guys, and thanks for the support!_


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter.

* * *

The wind whipped against her cheeks, as she glided through the air. Her hands gripping her broomstick.

She had dismissed her team for the day. Giving them all a pat on the back for their hard work, while offering to stay behind and clean up.

After a quick fly, of course.

Quidditch had been her saving grace, Tansy had realized soon after joining the sport. Had been something for her to focus on.

_(Other than the deaths-)_

Rain droplets poured onto her, as she completed spins and turns while mid air. A laugh escaped her as she finally went to land on the ground. Ponytail whipping behind her.

She ran her fingers through her hair, effectively removing the tie. With a shake of her head, the curly nature of her hair was once again present.

"Hullo Tansy," Tansy froze at the address. Sweat coated her back, as she ran a hand through her blonde mane.

_(Lily and Petunia had been gifted with perfect hair. She had been cursed with this-)_

Her Quidditch uniform was covered in dirt, boots soaked, as she gave the boy in front of her a tight smile.

"Black," She responded curtly, brushing past him. She made her way to the locker rooms, the younger boy fast on her heels. "To what do I owe the honor?" She was met with a barking laugh.

"Nothing, nothing," he said, his hands raised in a placating manner. His grin was all teeth. "You look stunning this evening, that's all,"

Dirt was currently matted into her hair, blonde curls sticking to her face in what looked to be straight out of a horror movie. She glared up at the boy, before lightly pushing his shoulder.

"You're hilarious Black," She drawled, "Absolutely _hilarious_. Now what is it you _really_ want?" Grey eyes dimmed slightly, as the boy stood up straighter.

She began to take off her Quidditch uniform, and sent the boy a narrowed look as his cheeks reddened. He turned around, as the girl began to undress. She pulled out a divider to separate the two.

"Please hurry up," She replied. "I like you Black,_ really_ I do. But unless you wanna hop in the shower with me I really don't have much time-"

"It's about James," Tansy let out a breath she didn't know she had been holding.

_(Of course-Had Potter told him-_)

"Potter? I would've assumed it'd be about Lupin. Isn't the full moon approaching-,"

"You're dodging the question," Sirius stated, running a hand through his hair. He pursed his lips together. "Did something happen between you two?" Tansy snorted, as she hurriedly shook her head.

"No offense to your boyfriend Black," Tansy replied, grabbing a towel. "But, he's not exactly my type. Also, I'm pretty sure he's been infatuated with a certain redhead for the past five years," Sirius let out a sound of frustration at that, as he shook his head.

"That's the problem," he replied, looking just about ready to pull his hair out. "No offense to your sister, but she can be a bit of a _shrew_-"

"Offense taken," Tansy replied, brow furrowing, as she shoved Sirius' shoulder. "Potter's the one that needs to get it together. What does he expect to happen? With all the pranks he pulls, he's not exactly endearing himself to her,"

"It would if she had a sense of humor," Tansy rolled her eyes, as she made her way to the shower area. She sent Sirius a look, as she wrapped a towel around her.

"Unless you're secretly a woman Black," Tansy drawled, gesturing to the female only bathing area. "Please get to the point. I'd rather you didn't see me naked,"

Sirius remained silent for a moment, before letting out a haggard sigh.

"He hasn't mentioned your sister once," Sirius replied, causing something in Tansy's stomach to drop. "He said hello to her on the first day of school. That was it! No grand gesture, no attempt to get her to go out with him-"

_(Her hands were entangled in his hair-)_

Something shifted in her stomach, as she pressed a hand to her temple.

_(What had she done?)_

"Remus thinks it's strange too," Sirius stated, hand pressed to his chin. Tansy gathered herself, and pinned a glare on her face.

"What am I Black? Your _keeper_? What has any of this to do with me-"

"He stares at you," Sirius responded, raising a brow at her. Tansy scoffed at that, the feeling in her chest growing heavier by the second.

_(she was screwed-)_

"I've noticed," She responded, tightening her towel. "It doesn't mean anything. Trust me, in a few days he'll be back to simpering after Lily. He's probably only trying to make her jealous,"

Sirius didn't look convinced, and opened his mouth to protest.

Tansy raised a hand to stop him, and placed a hand on his shoulder.

"Nothing happened between me and Potter," She replied, the lie feeling rough on her tongue. "He's a decent bloke when he wants to be, but he and Lily are meant for each other. They'll be… that one epic love story. I wouldn't worry if I were you,"

With a tight smile,Tansy placed a hand on the boy's back and pushed him out of the room.

"Now go! I have places to be, and I'm sure you do too," She stated, letting out a slight yawn. "Have a good evening Black," She sent him a grin that was all teeth, before slamming the door shut.

_(He stares at you-)_

She leaned against the door, as she bowed her head slightly. She slowly walked towards the shower area, and crouched down as the water beat down on her skin.

* * *

She had become intertwined with the Marauders in the beginning of her third year.

She had known them in passing, of course. It was hard not to with their constant harassment of Severus and Potter's obsession with her sister. She had been rather lucky to not have any meaningful sort of relationship with them, however.

It all started with a box of chocolates.

She had been in the Hospital Wing, nursing a broken leg from a rather violent fall she had taken on her broomstick. Alice-Being the utter sweetheart she was- had purchased her a box from Honey dukes.

She had been munching away, when the sound of whimpering broke through her concentration.

She froze for a moment, before opting to ignore it. They were in a Hospital Wing, whoever it was would receive the help they needed soon enough.

The sound wouldn't relent, however.

Eventually, Tansy drew open the blinds, eyes narrowed in anticipation.

Her stomach clenched at the sight.

Remus Lupin laid in the hospital bed, fresh scars across his face, as he tossed and turned in his sleep. All complaints escaped her, as she looked at the half eaten box of chocolates in her hands.

She had placed it on the table next to him, and hurriedly limped back to her bed.

The Marauders-although they hadn't gone by that name yet- had started pestering her after that.

* * *

_(Unbeknownst to her, Remus hadn't been asleep. He watched through half lidded eyes, as she furiously scribbled down a note. Claiming it was from a secret admirer. He told her years later with a rather cheeky smile on his face-)_

* * *

She remembered blinking down at them, as Potter saddled up next to her with a quill in one hand and parchment in the other. A dimple forming smile etched onto his face.

_"Potter, Black-"_

_"C'mon Tansy,"_ Potter had replied, elbowing her side as Sirius plopped down next to her. _"We're friends aren't we?"_

_"We're acquaintances at best, Potter,"_ Tansy drawled, running a hand through her hair. The boy just laughed at that _"Now, what do you two need with little old me?"_

Sirius just grinned at her, as he took the parchment in James' hands and unfolded it.

A rough sketch of Hogwarts took over the page.

_"You're always going on about how you're an upperclassmen,"_ Black had brought forth, cheeky grin on his face, as Tansy gaped at the parchment. _"And Charms is your best subject, is it not?"_

_"So teach us,"_ Potter had brought forth. _"Teach us what we need to do,"_ Mouth slightly open, Tansy had sputtered at that as she turned her gaze to the messy haired boy.

_"What you need to do for **what**, Potter?"_

The look in his eyes made Tansy freeze for just a moment.

_"To become **legends**,"_

* * *

_(For the majority of Tansy's fourth year, the Marauders and her would search tirelessly for spells strong enough to map the entire castle. Spend nights exploring to discover new hidden passages. At the beginning of her fifth year, the Marauders Map was finally made-)_

* * *

At the beginning of her fifth year, Tansy began to realize that James Potter was actually quite attractive.

It had been a slow realization. Like the realization that he was finally growing taller than her. Or the realization that his messy hair was endearing in its own way.

_(The realization that he and her sister were destined for each other, put a dampener on Tansy's crush, however-)_

There was also the fact that she was dating Fabian Prewett.

It had been on and off at first, with the two only accompanying each other to Hogesmade every so often. Then the two had gotten a bit more serious.

She was blindsided when he told her that he loved her.

_(Blue eyes filled with so much emotion-"I've never met anyone quite like you-")_

She cared for the redhead, truly she did. But it wasn't love, it would never be _love_.

With a pained look on her face, she broke it off with him two weeks before his graduation from Hogwarts.

_"Why'd you end it with him?"_ Caradoc had questioned the night after, splitting a bottle of fire whiskey with her on top of the astronomy tower. Blue eyes crinkled with concern. _"You and Prewett were made for each other,"_

Tansy had shrugged her shoulders at that, as she laid down on her back. Her hair spread out behind her.

_'Doc?"_ She questioned, the fire whiskey burning in her throat. She took another swig despite the fact. _"Are you free this Hogesmade?"_

_"Do you need me to be?"_

Tansy wordlessly nodded her head, as Caradoc laid down next to her. He stroked her hair comfortingly, as she leaned into his touch.

_"Then I'm free,"_

* * *

She had kissed James Potter at the end of her fifth year.

It had been the annual end of year party, where drinking, dancing, and other activities that her mother would not approve of took place.

She remembered feeling floaty, out of this world, as she danced in the middle of the room. Her curly hair, which was usually tied in a ponytail had been let down as her peers cheered her on.

_(Fabian was in the corner, shoving his tongue down some random Ravenclaw's throat. She tried not to feel hurt at that-)_

She felt ecstasy, _euphoria_.

Then she felt nothing.

When she came to, her arm was draped around someone's shoulders. The smell of cologne filling her nostrils as she struggled to stand up straight. She found it was a fruitless endeavor, however, as she sagged against her companion.

Potter had huffed out a laugh, as Tansy glared up at him. Her legs wobbled, as she used the taller boy to steady herself.

_"Look who finally decided to wake up?"_ He had joked, as Tansy sagged forward. _"I thought you of all people would be able to hold your liquor,"_

_"Shut up,"_ She had grumbled, her head throbbing. _"Shouldn't you be at the party still?"_

_"And leave you passed out on the floor?"_ He retorted. _"Come now, Evans. My mum raised me better than that,"_

Her face burned at that, as she groaned in mortification.

_"I passed out? Jorkins is gonna have a field day with that,"_ She replied, raising a hand to her temple. Potter snorted at that, and shook his head.

_"Jorkins wasn't looking too good herself,"_ Potter replied, hazel eyes gleaming slightly. _"We practically had to beg her to keep her clothes on,"_ A laugh bubbled in Tansy's throat, as he shoulders shook. A tiny smile graced her lips.

_"Lily's wrong about you,"_ Tansy replied, causing the boy to tense slightly. Mismatched eyes looked up at him, slightly mischievous. _"You're a decent kid. Much better than some of the blokes around here. Caradoc's number one in my heart, but you drive a hard bargain Potter-"_

_"James,"_ Tansy had blinked at the interruption.

Potter pushed his glasses up his nose, as he cleared his throat. His cheeks were slightly red.

_"You can call me James, y'know,"_ He said, running a hand through his hair. _"It's only fair. I've been calling you by your first name since second year-"_

_"So you wouldn't mix me up with Lily-"_

"_Because we're** friends**,"_ Potter retorted, firmly. Something warm settled in Tansy's stomach at that.

The corridor was silent for a few moments, as Potter escorted her to the Hufflepuff common room. He breathed out through his nose, as he gave her a look.

For some reason, Tansy couldn't help but think that his eyes looked incredibly beautiful.

_(it was the alcohol talking. It had to be-)_

_"Will you be alright-"_

"_**James,"**_ She had tested out, the name feeling foreign on her tongue. The boy looked blindsided by that.

_(Maybe… just this once-)_

Tansy crashed her lips against his.

* * *

_(She felt guilty for doing it. She felt even more guilty for enjoying it-)_

* * *

"What are your plans for after Hogwarts, Miss Evans?" Tansy smoothed out her skirt after that.

"Journalism," She replied, folding her hands together. Professor Sprout beamed at that, as she took down a few notes.

"Excellent career choice, my dear! The Daily Prophet, I'm assuming?"

"If they'll have me," Tansy said, her lips twitching upwards. "I've always found the field fascinating,"

"They'd be fools not to take you," Sprout replied, a sweet smile still etched onto her face. "I do hope you won't forget about us when you make it as a famous reporter," Tansy pressed a hand to her heart in mock hurt.

"Professor Sprout!" She admonished. "How could I _ever_ forget about you? You'd best believe I'll be back to visit,"

The professor let out a laugh at that, as she shook her head.

Tansy bid Professor Sprout farewell, as she exited the room. She noticed the corridor was eerily silent, however. Her meeting _had_ run a bit late, so she tried not to think much of it.

She walked slowly, taking in the sights around her, as she fiddled with the wand on her waist.

_(11" Birch Wood with a Phoenix feather core-"I expect great things from you Miss Evans-")_

Something dropped in Tansy's stomach, as she let out a gasp. A drop of blood dripped onto Tansy's shoes.

Mary McDonald was hung from the ceiling, blood dripping from her head as she lay unconscious.

_**'Mudbloods better watch out**_' was written across the ceiling next to her.

* * *

What do you guys think?

Things you guys said:

**Soooo if James is with her, there'll be no Harry?** X You'll have to wait and see.

**I was wondering what made you replace your old OC with this new OC, or where the new rewrite idea came from.** X In the original draft of Hiraeth, it would've taken me a much longer time to finish it. This story allows me to get right to the action. I also didn't like the way Petunia was turning out, therefore Tansy was born.

**Ok, I'm hooked. I feel like she has goldilocks hair; voluminous, tight curls. And maybe she grew into her eyes. I feel like the physical features were made fun of while little is what makes us unique and beautiful.** X Tansy did grow into her eyes, and definitely isn't as ugly as she'll portray herself to be at times. Her hair is also a lot messier and wild than her sisters.

**Knowing that Tansy is a year older than Lily, makes wonder to how the meeting between Sev and Lily went. Is Tansy a flower?** X Severus will appear in the coming chapters, and we'll get more insight into the relationship he has with Tansy and Lily respectively. Tansy _is_ a flower, and it actually symbolizes hostility and a declaration of war. Which I thought was rather fitting for Tansy's character.

Questions for you Guys:

What are your thoughts on Tansy, so far? On James x Tansy?(Jansy? Jamey?)

Questions for me?

_P.S. I hope you guys enjoyed this chapter! Don't forget to leave a review!_


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter.

* * *

Whenever she danced, Tansy had felt limitless.

Her mother had always said she danced even while in the womb. She would kick in the woman's stomach whenever music was playing, directly on beat.

She would let the music flow through her, as she would go over her routine. Her instructors praise bouncing off of her, as her body bended in whichever direction she needed it to.

Her dad had always called her his little gazelle. Every step she took was filled with grace, purpose.

Quidditch had helped to fill the void of dancing for the school year. But, every summer she would come back and let loose.

Until the summer she turned fifteen, at least.

* * *

_Dear Tansy,_

_I heard about what happened with McDonald, and I'm sorry to say that once again I heard it from Caradoc and not you. We will be having words Evans. I'm free next Hogesmeade, and I hope to see you there._

_I'm dodging the most important question, however. Are you alright? I know things have been getting hectic on the outside, but I always thought Hogwarts would be safe from this sort of thing. I heard the culprits haven't even been caught._

_Once again I'm dodging the point._

_Tansy, I know you were the one that found McDonald. Once again, Doc told me. I also know that no matter how tough you may act, this type of thing would still bother you._

_I just wanted to say that I'm here for you._

_I'm not good with this sentimental bullshit, you know that. But… you're one of the few people I actually find tolerable._

_If you ever need to talk about anything, please rely on me._

_Love, Alice,_

_P.S. To answer your question, no, I don't have a crush on Longbottom. He's completely incompetent. I don't know how he got into this program-_

* * *

Mary still hadn't woken up.

It had been a week since the whole ordeal, and the culprits still hadn't been found. Slytherin being on the receiving end of most of it.

_(A third year Slytherin had been put in the hospital earlier that week, his face hexed beyond recognition-)_

The library was quiet that evening, the smell of fresh parchment and ink overtaking the area. Every soul in the school was instead viewing the Gryffindor vs. Ravenclaw Quidditch game. The game having been the subject of many conversations for weeks.

All except one.

"Really Rus? It's a Saturday night and you're studying? I thought I taught you better than that," The boy in front of her tensed.

Severus Snape looked worse for wear. Dark circles prominent on his already sunken face, as he hunched into himself.

Tansy fiddled with her ponytail, as she plopped down in the seat across from him. She took a look at his textbook and hummed.

"Charms? I could help you with that if you'd like-"

"What do you want Tansy?" Severus spit out, his eyes narrowed as he went on the defensive. Tansy just smiled, her eyes lighting up.

"You're being quite rude, don't you think?" She replied chirpily. "Just wanted to check in on you. See how you're doing and all that rubbish," She whipped out her wand, ignoring the way the boy flinched at the motion, and mended the boy's poorly put together bag. "And to fix that for you,"

Severus visibly sagged at that and placed a hand to his temple. He let out a deep sigh as he closed all the open books surrounding him with a flick of his wand. He pursed his lips together, before finally meeting Tansy's gaze.

"You and Lily aren't talking," He stated, as if the notion was completely foreign to him. "You didn't sit with us on the train," Tansy just smiled at that.

_(Lily, Lily, Lily-Of course he wants to talk about her-that's all anyone ever wants to talk about-)_

"Don't you worry yourself with that, Rus," Tansy replied, pulling on the boy's cheek before he swatted it away with a scowl. "Me and Lils just had a difference of opinion-"

"She thinks you've changed," Her smile twitched.

_(All the glares-Disapproving looks-"Petunia's right-")_

"That's life, Rus," Tansy replied, folding her hands together. "People change. You couldn't expect me to be freaky little "Toad Eyes" forever, did you?"

"Please don't call yourself that," Severus replied, wincing. "I always thought that was an idiotic insult," Tansy just nodded her head, drumming her fingers against the table. Severus froze momentarily.

"Are you still in love with her?" Severus glared at her, causing Tansy to raise up her hands placatingly.

"Sorry, stupid question," The blonde replied. "I'm just curious. Haven't really seen you in a while since you spend all your time hanging around your... friends,"

Severus gathered his belongings at that, placing them into his newly mended bag. He turned around and proceeded to briskly walk away from Tansy.

Tansy jumped in front of him, before he had a chance to leave.

"Rus please-"

"You can drop the niceties, Evans," Severus sneered. "I don't know anything about what happened with McDonald. Neither do any of the people I hang around with,"

"Severus, they're not your friends,"

"They accept me,"

"I accept you," Tansy hissed, garnering attention from Madam Pince who gifted the two with a harsh glare. "I've always accepted you-"

"The real me," Severus stated, pushing past her. He sent her one last look, his obsidian gaze piercing. Tansy just shook her head, her ponytail swaying.

"I know the real you-"

"It's just like you said," Severus said, his voice low, as he shook her hand off his shoulder. "People change,"

Without a single glance back, Severus left Tansy standing alone.

* * *

_(Her wand was pointed towards his neck-She shoved her forearm in his face-"Is this what you support?")_

* * *

She had met Severus Snape at the age of nine. Her knees covered in dirt, and her elbows especially pointy. Preferring to wear shorts as opposed to the dresses her mother would try and force on her.

She remembered thinking he was sweet.

He had been a shy little thing, always sticking to Lily like a limpet. He had been absolutely terrified to meet her.

Dark eyes had refused to meet her own, as Lily proudly introduced her new friend. Petunia had scrunched her nose at the boy, already having met him prior. With her nose turned up in the air, she had walked off to play with the other neighborhood girls.

_(Tansy didn't miss it, however. The hurt present in their sister's eyes when Lily and Tansy didn't follow-)_

Tansy looked over Severus once more. She took in his baggy clothes, the bruise beneath his right eye and instantly felt her heart lurch.

_(I can help him-)_

She had smiled at him, and reached a hand toward him.

"Hullo Rus," She had replied, taking the boy's hands in her own. "Lily won't shut up about you. I hope we can be good friends too,"

Lily protested at that, as Tansy reached over to ruffle her hair. Severus seemed a bit dumb struck at the notion.

"Friends?" He questioned, speaking properly for the first time. His cheeks reddened slightly. "I… really?" The boy looked hopeful.

_(I've gotta help him-)_

"Of course," Tansy replied, placing a hand on her hip. "Why would I lie about something like that?"

Severus looked down at their joined hands, and back towards Tansy. His lips twitched slightly.

The smile he gave her made Tansy feel ten times lighter.

* * *

Gryffindor won the game.

Tansy rolled her eyes as the captain-a seventh year by the name of Eddie Bones- gave her a shit eating grin from his place in the sky.

'You're next' The boy mouthed, brown eyes twinkling.

Tansy just flipped him off.

Josie patted Tansy's shoulder, having seen the display as well.

"You got this in the bag, Z," Josie stated, watching the Gryffindors jubilate in the sky. "The Gryffs aren't that good,"

"They have amazing defense and offense," Tansy replied, furrowing her brow. "Frankly we're screwed if we don't get it together,"

The area was silent for a few moments, before someone let out a rather cheeky laugh and clapped Tansy on her other shoulder.

"That's what I love about you Cap," Archie Locke-The Hufflepuff chaser- stated, watching the Gryffindors with a rather goofy grin on his face. "You're always so optimistic,"

"If we lose it's completely on me," Tansy replied, flipping her hair behind her shoulder "Which is why we won't lose. I refuse to let Gryffindor get the Quidditch Cup this year. Bones needs to get knocked off his high horse,"

"Bones is rather dreamy if you think about it," Josie replied, sighing. Caradoc scoffed at that, two glasses of pumpkin juice in hand as he took the seat beside Tansy.

"Bones is a twit," He stated, placing a cup of pumpkin juice in Tansy's hand. "You could do much better Alcott,"

"Who?" The girl questioned scrunching her nose. "Not many options to choose from. All the mature men are taken,"

"Broaden your horizons, Jo," Tansy stated, mismatched eyes fixated on the field. "Date a muggle-" Caradoc kicked her in the shin, giving her a pointed look. "Or just someone you wouldn't normally go out with,"

"Like who?" Josie questioned, brown eyes twinkling.

"Go for someone a bit immature," Tansy said, folding her arms as the brisk autumn wind whipped against her cheeks. "You might be able to change them,"

Josie just hummed at that, and leaned into Tansy's side.

"I don't have time to waste on immature little boys," She murmured, her gloved hands rubbing together. "Merlin, it's freezing,"

Tansy was careful not to look at Caradoc.

"Evans," Someone called out, tapping Tansy's arm. "Your sister's calling you,"

Tansy just blinked owlishly.

_("She says you've changed-")_

Caradoc leaned next to her, his chin resting on her shoulder.

"Want me to chase her away?" The boy asked, blue eyes twinkling slightly. "Make up an excuse for you?"

"As much as I appreciate the offer, Doc," She replied, her hands clamming up. "She is my sister. I'm gonna have to speak with her eventually,"

She gently pushed Josie off of her, gave Caradoc a slightly apologetic look, and walked down the stands.

Sure enough she was met with red hair, and dark green eyes.

The two girls stood at the bottom of the stands stiffly for a few moments. Lily cleared her throat.

"Tansy," She started off curtly, Tansy pursed her lips at that.

"Lillian," The redhead turned red.

"Oh why am I even bothering," Lily muttered to herself, running a hand over her face. She folded her arms, tightening her jacket in the process. "I just wanted to ask if Petunia wrote to you as well," Tansy huffed out a laugh.

"Why on Earth would Tuney ever write to little old me?" Tansy questioned folding her arms. "I think you already know the answer to that question,"

"I figured," Lily grumbled, before steeling herself. She gave Tansy a firm stare. "She's… Petunia's getting married,"

_(A large man with beady eyes- A spoiled child who grew up too late-)_

Tansy laughed.

"Can you not take anything seriously?" Lily questioned, her brow furrowing. "Our sister's getting married-"

"And she didn't even bother to write to me about it," Tansy snapped, her tone caustic. "Why the Hell should I care?"

"You haven't exactly been supportive-"

"As if she's ever been supportive of us?" Tansy questioned incredulously, her voice rising. "Tell me, Lily, didn't she ask you when you were going to give up on this magic rubbish and go out and prepare for a real job? And apparently I'm the horrible sister," Lily's eyes flashed.

"At least Petunia's actually acting human!" The redhead snapped. "At least she's not shutting everyone out of her life,"

"I never-"

"Oh yes you did," Lily interrupted, folding her arms. "You've been this emotionless shell ever since-"

"Good day, Lily," Tansy interrupted, pushing past the redhead. She granted the redhead a sharp smile. "Give our sister my regards. I'm sure the wedding will be lovely since I'm obviously not invited,"

"You're being childish-"

"Good day, Lily," Tansy replied once more, with a firm undertone. She could hear the redhead cry out in frustration, as she turned the corner.

* * *

_(Green eyes that shone-"Why won't you talk to me anymore, Tansy-")_

* * *

"Montgomery's been checking you out all evening," Sirius stated, leaning on Remus' shoulder. Music blared in the common room, as the Gryffindors celebrated their second consecutive win of the year. "Honestly, Moony, you need to loosen up a bit," The boy raised a brow at that, confiscating a bottle of firewhiskey from one of the younger students who had snuck into the party and drinking it himself.

"Montgomery?" Remus questioned, plopping down in the seat next to James. "Isn't she dating-"

"Doesn't matter who she's dating," Sirius replied, waving a hand as he took the bottle from Remus' hand. He chanced a look at James, who seemed slightly out of it, and raised his voice. "Don't tell me you still have a thing for Tansy?"

James dropped the glass he was holding, as Remus swatted at Sirius' shoulder. He seemed to be broken out of whatever trance he was in, as his eyes bugged out of his head.

"What?" The boy sputtered, ignoring the mess he just created. Remus just shook his head, as he vanished the mess with a flick of his wand.

"It was only for a bit in second year," Remus replied, the tips of his ears slightly red. "Nothing came from it," He sent Sirius a slight glare. "It was also something we agreed to never speak of again," Sirius just shrugged his shoulders.

"It was common knowledge," Sirius replied, grey eyes scouring over the room. "Everyone knew," Sirius furrowed his brow, "Well, everyone except Prongs, apparently,"

"Did Tansy know?" James questioned, his glasses slightly askew. His two companions simply shrugged their shoulders.

"If she did, she didn't say anything about it," Remus replied, letting out a sigh of relief. "I was a bit pathetic around her," Sirius barked out a laugh.

"A bit? You practically melted whenever she spoke to you," The boy replied shaking his head. "If I were you, I'd go for it now. Show off that shiny prefect badge of yours,"

"Bugger off," Remus stated, rolling his eyes. "She's like an older sister,"

Sirius just shrugged his shoulders, before turning to James once more.

"Speaking of Tansy," Sirius stated nonchalantly, looking over the boys head, noting how the boy tensed. "Here comes her little sister right now,"

Lily stormed by, green eyes flashing, as Dorcas Meadows was hot on her heels. She walked up into the girls dormitory.

"Wonder what has her knickers in a twist," Sirius said, as James seemed to relax slightly. He didn't attempt to speak to the redhead, however.

Sirius scowled at that, and slugged James in the shoulder.

"What the Hell Padfoot-"

"What is the matter with you, Prongs?" Sirius snapped. James winced at that as he rubbed his shoulder. "You've been completely out of it all evening. You just won another game for Gryffindor, you should be celebrating," Remus just nodded his head.

"Padfoot's right," Remus replied, taking another drink. "You've been… quieter, recently," James just let out a sigh, and ran a hand through his hair.

_("More muggle borns have been disappearing-We're getting ready for war-")_

"I'll tell you about it, later," James replied, getting up from his seat. "Why don't you two bums take some notes from Peter and go have yourselves a good time?"

Sure enough, the fourth member of their crew was busy shoving his tongue down Nina Edgecombe's throat. Sirius just nodded his head in approval.

"That lucky bastard," James just rolled his eyes, waving the two of them off as he walked out of the common room.

* * *

"Out after curfew, Potter? I'm disappointed," James felt his throat close up.

Mismatched gazed up at him lazily, the tip of her wand lighting up the dark corridor they were in. Tansy smiled up at him, and began to walk closer.

_(She crashed her lips to his-)_

"Being a bit hypocritical, aren't we?" He retorted, careful to keep his voice still. "You're not exactly setting the best example as an upperclassman," Tansy just shrugged her shoulders, settling next to the boy. Her lips turned upwards.

"Never said I was a good role model," She replied, letting out a yawn. "God knows I'm the last person anyone should emulate themselves after," She pursed her lips together, as she seemed to contemplate something.

The two of them walked in silence for a few moments, James resolutely staring forward. Tansy eventually let out a deep sigh, and turned towards James once more. James gulped.

_(Here it was-)_

"I'm… I'm sorry Potter," His eyes bugged out of his head.

"What-"

"Everything that happened last year was stupid," She stated, ignoring James' flabebrgasted look. "I was drunk, stupidly drunk, take off your top and dance on the astronomy tower drunk-"

_That was not an image he needed in his head_, James thought, as the girl rambled on.

"The point is," Tansy stated, taking a step closer to James. "You're my friend. I know I don't say it a lot, but you mean a lot to me. Can we just forget what happened?"

_(Her hands caught in his hair-)_

James was silent for a moment, Tansy granted him a rather pleading look.

He bumped shoulders with the elder girl, as a boyish grin took over his face.

"Of course, I can't exactly blame you. I know I'm irresistible,"

"You're insufferable,"

"It's part of my charm," He replied, giving an award winning smile. His eyes lit up. "Besides, you're captain now, I haven't had a chance to properly congratulate you."

"I thought you turning my hair orange was your way of saying congrats,"

"I'm being serious. I'm still the superior Quidditch player of course, but that's a pretty big accomplishment for you," Tansy rolled her eyes.

"Of course you can't even give a compliment without finding a way to stroke your own ego,"

"I'm just stating facts, love,"

Tansy laughed, and James smile grew. He found himself wanting to bottle up the sound-

James froze in his tracks.

_(Oh shit-)_

Tansy looked back at him, and gave him a look. Mismatched eyes staring straight through him.

_(He remembered being in first year. Being starstruck by the Hufflepuff keeper who seemed to glide through the air. Her laugh echoing. He had never seen eyes like that before-)_

"Forgetting something, Potter?" She questioned. "I can wait for you if you'd like?"

"You don't have to wait-"

"Rubbish," Tansy replied waving a hand. "I can't let a maiden such as yourself walk alone. Especially now of all times. Where were you planning to go anyway?"

"Back to the common room, actually," James said hurriedly. "Me and Sirius had to do something,"

"You just left the common room-"

"I wanted some fresh air," Tansy folded her arms.

"You usually go outside for that,"

"I love the smell of the hallways," He stated, taking a step back. "It's refreshing,"

Tansy just nodded her head slowly.

"Whatever floats your boat," The blonde replied, letting out a yawn. "Good night,"

"Good night," James replied, his voice rising an octave. "I'll… I'll see you later, alright,"

Tansy just waved helplessly to him, as he tripped over himself making his way back to the Gryffindor Common Room.

* * *

Tansy frowned at James' retreating back, but just shrugged her shoulders. At least they were on speaking terms.

_("He stares at you-")_

Tansy just shook her head, as she continued to walk down the corridor. She checked to see if anyone was following her, before stopping in front of a huge door.

She entered the Room of Requirement, just as she did every Saturday night for the past four years. The doors closed softy behind her.

She looked around the room, and let out a soft sigh as she dropped to her knees.

She had Ravenclaw's Diadem, it being the only one of the horcruxes she had been able to actually obtain. Other than that she had nothing to show for her work.

Riddle's Diary was locked somewhere in Malfoy Manor, a mudblood like her having no way to access it. She had no idea where the rest of them were, only having faint traces of possible locations.

_(You're running out of time-)_

_(You've had years to prepare, and you're still so behind-)_

_(Why don't you ask for help-)_

"Who would I ask?" She said to no one in particular, the voices beginning to subside. "Who-I sound crazy even to myself. Who would actually believe me?"

The voices were quiet once more.

_(She had always been the strange one. The quiet daughter. The one that wasn't quite right. The one that couldn't be understood-)_

She pushed the diadem off to the side, and rose from her place on the ground. Her wand firmly in hand.

A practice dummy appeared in front of her.

_(She wouldn't be weak. When they came she would be ready-)_

**_"Incendio,"_**

* * *

_("Why do you do this?" The voices had asked her. They would ask her the same question every time. Tansy just smiled._

_She would think of Lily, of Petunia, of Caradoc. Of people that would be wronged over something that they couldn't control._

_…._

_"I do it for them,")_

* * *

How have you guys been?

It's been a few months, but I hope you guys enjoyed this chapter. I really do want to finish this story, and I hope to update more frequently in the future.

Some Things You Guys Said:

**So far, I really enjoy Tansy. Tbh she's not what I expected (but in a good way!). She's determined, but unsure (and scared, I think), stressed etc. She feels really human and I really like that! Not gonna lie I'm really here for the whole James x Tansy thing. I'm here for the TEA! I thought there was a bit of tension between her and Lily in the past chapter and I wonder if this has anything to do with it? Also love the conflict tansy will have to face with her James, with lily , and most importantly with herself. I feel like she'll grow a lot as a character and I'm excited to see how it goes!**X James and Tansy had a bit of a reconciliation this chapter, but things will still be a bit awkward. Tansy wants to forget what happened, but James is going to have a harder time doing that. In regards to Lily, their conflict has nothing to do with James. Lily doesn't even know about what happened. Their problems will be addressed in upcoming chapters.

**Also wonder how Tansy will tackle Voldemort/Tom Riddle. Me personally would find a way to kill him and his followers. Because I certainly wouldn't trust Dumbledore and his methods. For crying out loud that old man forced Harry to live with his abusive aunt's family & raised Harry to be a Martyr. **X As you can see, Tansy is struggling when it comes to Voldemort. She has ideas of what she should do, but struggles with taking action. It'll be explored more later on.

Didn't answer all of your reviews, but I appreciate all of them. I just answered the ones that kind of had questions snuck into them. If you have a question that I missed, you can always PM me.

Thanks for reading, and I hope you all have good Holidays!


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